Why do I look forward to the school holidays? Every week I count down the next school holidays and then think on day two why! 
 Holidays equal lack of routine. Lack of routine sends Z a little wild! 
Monday, it started off ok, S portage came but to go through forms instead of play,Z was  fine with this. She left, we went to see my nan. Armed with his iPad he was ok. Went into a new shop and that was it, end of the world, meltdown plus temper, if he could have gotten out of that pram and ran he would have. Maybe after hitting everyone in his way first. Gets back to the car and calm, as if nothing had happened. 
As it was Monday took my nan shopping, I take her every other week normally Z comes too. Gets outside one shop and he really didn’t want to get out of that car. He threw himself on the floor, he kicked and screamed, he hit and he tried to bite. I actually shouted ‘Enough’ to get his attention, I’d say the attention of people in the car park but they were already looking! I carried him to the trolley like a sack of spuds! He screamed and I mean screamed. Had a few looks, a few comments to each other, so I gave him a drink, ( I open things and pay for them, if it helps I’ll try anything) whilst he was drinking nice and calm, said women mentioned spoilt. His drink was finished he kicked off again, so I opened buttons! I’d do it again to see the look on their faces. He didn’t want the buttons, but the Christmas lights caught his attention.  On the way out he saw the rainbow drops so obviously he had to have them, for a stress free shop he can! 
Back in car he was a happy little boy, rainbow drops and a drink. Next stop Asda. He was fine getting out of car and into trolley, until he tipped those rainbow drops, and because he tipped a few he had to tip the rest all whilst screaming! Out comes the buttons that were in my bag from last shop, he’s fine, until, he drops that last button and I refused to pick it up. This now I know is temper, this isn’t autism. I stopped to get cheese, he saw cheese dippers and kept using my hand, he’s going around with them, that’s fine he choose them. We passed the Pringles and that was it, he choose the blue tin, using my hand, and the rest of the shop was easy. Maybe I should keep some Pringles in my bag? 
I’d like to say a lot of this day was temper. His awareness is growing, he’s getting to the stage he knows he can hit and kick and bite and well what are we going to do about it? But, in all fairness I think it was split, going into a new shop, then a shop after another shop, maybe just proved too much. Being holidays there were a few more people about, plus my cousin, maybe that had a part to play in it as normally shopping it’s just me and nan? I don’t know, I know he was quite quiet at home and was sleeping by 7.15. He was worn out. After being sick last week and not really having much of a routine a full day could well have been too much. 

Having a quiet 5 minutes

Today, and yesterday I think he’s spent more time having a temper than being happy. 
Again his awareness is growing, he’s learning control and emotions. 
Today’s example; he wanted Pringles for breakfast, I said no, toast first. He threw himself on the floor, kicking and hitting. I wasn’t giving him Pringles! So he didn’t get them not even after toast. At diner he wanted Pringles, so again pizza first, he ate his pizza, looked at me and tipped the tin upside down. I said no Z, so in his let’s throw my self on the floor after stamping my feet in the Pringles mood, got him no Pringles! 

This was in a temper!

Today’s have been tempers, they have been let’s see how far I can push mam, if my neighbours heard him ( which I’m sure they did) they would think I was trying to kill him. Why? All because I wouldn’t let him in the kitchen when the oven was on! Again for his own safety when he’s throwing himself about, kicking and trying to hit me it’s an ‘enough’ shout that gets me away from the hitting! Yea ok I’m a whimp, I’ll put a baby gate between us! I’ve seen the mark on G’s arm from him being bit last night. Just because he’s had those teeth out it don’t hurt any less, those fangs are sharp, remind me of puppy teeth! 
As he’s throwing himself about the floor today, maybe because a duck didn’t go where it was supposed to so he flung all the other ducks then lost his temper, the postman came. Brown envelope, council stamp, eeeekkkk, a letter saying Z had been accepted for school in January. The ‘Yes’ came first ( come on my day have been screaming fits and nose wiping!) then omg what am I going to do? I’m going to loose my little guy to school. I have one term left, and after Christmas he’s a big boy. I’m going to be lost. I’m loosing my shadow temporary for a few weeks then full time. 
Teachers, good luck! After my last few days you may need it. 

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