Time hop reminded me that 5 years Z had his official diagnosis.

Five years have flown and we’ve gone in so many different directions since then. Sometimes I feel like we’re never going forward, that we’re on a boat in the middle of the ocean and going no where. Then I look back and look at what we’ve achieved.

Five years ago I’d never have thought of taking Z to the theatre or to the cinema, places he loves, most of the time I’m thankful to the sen sessions, but without those we’d never have tried these places. I’m praying that covid haven’t disrupted those too much.

Just day to day general things I can see how far not only Z has come but me too. I try my hardest to understand why he’s doing certain things, what need is being met by what ever it is he’s doing and how can I help him meet these needs safely.

Some days are hard work, some days I’m exhausted and wish he could use his words to tell me, then I think look how far he’s come from a screaming toddler. Well get there. We’re no longer changing nappies, he’s toilet trained, that’s a whole load of independence right there. We’re learning to bake cakes, and working on following commands like, “light on”, or “close door”, things five years ago would mean nothing at all.

Yes he’s seven nearly eight, some people say if they are not talking by seven then they never will, but I know he can do it if he really wants too.

Autism came into our life and can honestly say turned everything upside down. It stopped me, it made me stop and look. Made me realise there’s so much we take for granted just being able to use our voices when we want, why are we not trying for one second to get more into Z’s world than get angry because he’s not in ours? Surely being so clever we can get into his world? to watch him think, to watch and take everything in. He knows next door has a hot tub and we’re waiting on parts, he’s learnt to unlock my door, and being quicker than me will run next door, but not opening the gate running down the side. He’s learnt how to do things by watching, by observing and then by doing!

Autism have taught me so much, how to survive on so little sleep is a huge one, but to try and take more on board.

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