Iknow the lady didn’t mean it, but she’s not the first. She asked tonight how Z got on seeing the doctor, when I said, suspected autism, but I can’t see it changing, she was all apologetic. I’m guessing she isn’t going to be the first or the last. Her reply was, oh I’m sorry, is there a cure for that? Umm a cure? It’s autism not a disease! When I asked a family member to sponsor him yesterday, he said, oh I’m sorry I didn’t know there was any thing wrong, I hope he’ll be ok. What medication will he be on? Medication? I said no, no medication as he’s not sick. Should these comments annoy me? Anger me? At the moment I’m still dealing with things.
Is this because they are of the older generation? I don’t think for one second she was being rude as she is a lovely lady, and if she thought she had upset me she would be horrified.
So, to everybody, Z is Z, and without his quirky little ways like I’ve said before he wouldn’t be Z.
To me, when I look at Z I see a wonderful little boy. A very clever little boy, ( today I bought him a new jigsaw, okay, it only had 24 pieces but thought it would keep him quiet in church, 4 minutes it took him to complete it, yup, 4 minutes. ) what a waste of £5! But no I’ll keep it he loves Winnie the Pooh! I also see a loving little boy, he’s starting to give hugs and kisses. Z may not hit the milestones the same time as other children his age and some things he’s way ahead, just because he’s not talking it don’t mean he is stupid. But you don’t see that, you don’t see the way he does that 45 piece jigsaw, or put shapes in sorters, or the fine motor skills he has when putting pegs in the holes, all you see is no speech, and sometimes a screaming child, laying and kicking on the floor. For one moment stop, stop and stare if that makes you feel better, but actually take a moment to think.
I’m not telling you Z is an angel but he’s not a naughty child either. Take this evening for instance, we came home and couldn’t park outside the house, normally, I stop the car the music goes off, Z cries, ok Z kicks off, but I know in the time I get him out of the car and into the house, maybe kicking and screaming I can calm him down within two minutes, tonight it took at least 5. 5 minutes of crying and head hitting, why? Because I had to pick him up off the road and carry him up the street. If from just reading that little paragraph you take something away, when you see a child screaming and a flustered parent, it’s not always a naughty child or a parent who can’t cope.
I hope, when Z grows up that the world will be more understanding, a better place to be. I know the first step to that is me learning everything I can, and helping people close to us to see things the way Z sees things. Look at the bigger picture, maybe that rabbit in a hutch won’t keep his attention but, how the hutch stands up and how that door stays up may. I have no idea how Z will turn out, but I know I will do everything I can to make sure he turns out just fine.